Thank you for comment! So happy to hear that you found this enjoyable. It was a tricky one to write, for sure. I do have an audio version available in case you'd like to take a new angle on it. [ https://jarmagic.substack.com/p/ice-audio-short-story ] it's totally up to you. But, I would like to ask, if I may, what in this story stood out to you? Anything that may have to share would be very insightful to me as the writer. Thanks again, and I hope to hear back from you soon.
Loved the audio version - it definitely added an extra element to your already very elemental piece. This story is thrilling, the way you describe the scene and Him is chilling and very dark. You're a very skilled director in your detailed descriptions (for example this line served as a strong and clearly distinguishable scene. "The blood was indistinguishable; splattered everywhere, like a madman had been here just before.") I really loved this line "His name was a blessing on the tongues of those daring enough to speak it." As I read through, you elicit feelings - fear, stuck, intuition. I love the description of tears as solid !!!! The odd sentence structure especially when He was speaking were effective in adding a layer of other. And I loved the ending !!!!!
Welcome brother, come along, we have much to discuss. You will spend and eternety here so we must be fast. You have lived well is a true wonder you ended in hell. Whose to blame, you need a name? Truth is he wanted it this way. No one ever goes into heaven, he made a deal with satan. Relax, the torture has passed.
I don't mean to disrespect anyone's religion. Also, sorry for the light tone: Your piece was very emotional and I was starting to write something too personal not to hurt creating it. That’s why I ended up doing this.
This was marvellous. Very grand, very spooky. I enjoyed reading this a lot !!!! 💞
Thank you for comment! So happy to hear that you found this enjoyable. It was a tricky one to write, for sure. I do have an audio version available in case you'd like to take a new angle on it. [ https://jarmagic.substack.com/p/ice-audio-short-story ] it's totally up to you. But, I would like to ask, if I may, what in this story stood out to you? Anything that may have to share would be very insightful to me as the writer. Thanks again, and I hope to hear back from you soon.
Loved the audio version - it definitely added an extra element to your already very elemental piece. This story is thrilling, the way you describe the scene and Him is chilling and very dark. You're a very skilled director in your detailed descriptions (for example this line served as a strong and clearly distinguishable scene. "The blood was indistinguishable; splattered everywhere, like a madman had been here just before.") I really loved this line "His name was a blessing on the tongues of those daring enough to speak it." As I read through, you elicit feelings - fear, stuck, intuition. I love the description of tears as solid !!!! The odd sentence structure especially when He was speaking were effective in adding a layer of other. And I loved the ending !!!!!
Thank you so much for this comment. I value it to the highest degree. Wonderfully worded. Send me a message?
Great
Thank you friend, I'm glad you enjoyed it.
Take care!
Welcome brother, come along, we have much to discuss. You will spend and eternety here so we must be fast. You have lived well is a true wonder you ended in hell. Whose to blame, you need a name? Truth is he wanted it this way. No one ever goes into heaven, he made a deal with satan. Relax, the torture has passed.
I don't mean to disrespect anyone's religion. Also, sorry for the light tone: Your piece was very emotional and I was starting to write something too personal not to hurt creating it. That’s why I ended up doing this.